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Guidelines Writing Bad NewsYour goal when sending bad news is to write a message that is clear, fair, and courteous.
“Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.” Breaking Bad NewsYour browser does not support the video tag.109 Writing Bid RejectionsCopy this template. February 12, 2019 Mr. Felix Grove Sea-to-Mountain Landscapers 8900 Coast Road Seattle, WA 98134-6508 Dear Mr. Grove: Opening: Buffer: Specify the bid and thank the bidder. SUBJECT: Bid 4459 Everson City Park Thank you for your bid to design and develop Everson’s eight-acre city park adjacent to Kingston Elementary School and the Nooksack River. Middle: Highlight the reader’s strengths objectively, but specify why another bid won. Your bid was competitive for several of the criteria outlined in our original Request for Proposals (RFP). Your cost estimates, experience, and references were as strong as those from other bidders. However, Earth-Scape Design’s overall plan tipped the bid in their favor. By including a variety of native plant species, Earth-Scape’s natural, sustainable landscape will require less long-term care and create less stress on the Nooksack watershed. Because their plan contained a variety of plants, it also offered added educational value. Closing: If appropriate, encourage bidding on future projects. The Planning and Development Committee appreciates the work that you put into your proposal. We look forward to your interest in future Everson projects. Yours sincerely, Alice Potter Development Committee Chair 110 Writing Claim DenialsCopy this template. June 17, 2019 Confirmation of email sent on June 14, 2019. Mr. Jamaal Ellison Southeast Electric 1976 Boulder Road, Suite 1214 Charlotte, NC 28261-1203 Dear Mr. Ellison: Opening: Buffer: Restate the problem and show concern. We have finished investigating your concerns about the ATV16 drives that you installed for American Linc Company. We do understand that the drive and serial-link failures have inconvenienced both you and American Linc. Middle: Use sound evidence and state the claim denial clearly. After testing the drives you returned, our line engineer determined that they failed because the temperatures in the cabinet exceeded the maximum operating temperature of the drives, leading to electronic-component failure. As noted in the ATV16 manual, the drive may malfunction under such conditions. For this reason, we cannot repair the drives without charge. Offer helpful alternatives. We would be happy, however, to consider the following solutions:
Closing: Focus on the next step and on future business. Please let me know how you would like to proceed. I look forward to hearing from you and to continuing our partnership. Yours sincerely, Elaine Hoffman Product Manager 111 Writing Complaints (Basic)Copy this template. February 26, 2019 BHC Office Supply Company 39 Davis Street Pittsburgh, PA 15209-1334 ATTENTION: Shipping Manager Opening: Buffer: Establish the claim’s context. I’m writing about a problem with the purchase order #07-1201. Copies of the original PO plus two invoices are enclosed. Middle: Tactfully spell out the facts. Here is the sequence of events concerning PO 07-1201:
Specify the adjustment that you want. I am returning the partial order (duplicate items) by UPS. Please credit our account for the following: (1) the duplicate items listed on invoice 0151498 ($863.85), (2) the shipping costs of the partial order ($69.20), and (3) the UPS costs to return the duplicate items ($58.10). The total credit comes to $991.15. Closing: Anticipate future business. I look forward to receiving an adjusted statement and to continued cooperation in the future. Gary Sheridan—Office Manager gs/mc Enclosures 3 112 Writing Complaints (Serious)Copy this template. January 15, 2019 Mr. Steven Grinnel Director of Operations Industrial Aggregate Equipment Company 4018 Tower Road Albuquerque, NM 87105-3443 Dear Mr. Grinnel: Opening: Buffer: Specify the problem and the reason for concern. I am very concerned about the 40-foot Snorkel Lift that we contracted with you to rebuild when we traded in our old Marklift. Continued delays in the rebuilding schedule and subsequent problems with the lift itself leave me uncertain about Industrial Aggregate’s ability to provide Rankin Technologies with continued service. Middle: Provide a detailed outline of the problem and its history. Here is an overview of the problem:
Page 2 Steven Grinnel January 15, 2019 Middle: Give needed background and attach relevant support. We have been extremely disappointed with the lift’s condition and overall performance. Your original promise of a fully operational Snorkel Lift in “like new” condition by July 2018 (agreement copy enclosed) has not been met. In the past, we have appreciated your service and assistance. From our experience of the past six months, however, we can only conclude that you are experiencing problems that make it difficult for you to provide the service Rankin Technologies needs. Closing: State the proposed solution clearly and firmly. We want to resolve this issue. By February 15, 2019 please provide us with a lift that meets all the specifications agreed to and that has no operational deficiencies. If you are unable to provide the lift by that date, we will cancel our order and seek reimbursement for the used Marklift we traded in April 2018. Sincerely, Jane Ballentine Maintenance Project Engineer JB/RD
114 Writing Credit or Loan Application DenialsCopy this template. May 5, 2019 Ms. Mary-Lou Twain 780 East 41st Street, Apartment 712 Houston, TX 77022-1183 Dear Ms. Twain: Opening: Buffer: Express appreciation for the application. Thank you for meeting with loan officer Jean Olms last Friday and applying for a loan to open your gift shop. When we review an application, one of the factors that we consider is the applicant’s credit history. A good credit history shows a pattern of paying obligations. Middle: Provide objective reasons for the rejection. Then state the rejection and offer suggestions.At this time, because you have not established a credit history, we cannot approve your request to borrow $200,000. However, you can establish a good credit history in one of two ways:
Closing: If appropriate, encourage applying when conditions change. We hope that these suggestions will help you begin to establish a good credit history. Then you may reapply for the loan that you requested. Sincerely, Rodney Thayer President RT/BJH P.S. Please see the reverse side of this letter for information about your rights under the Federal Equal Credit Opportunity Act and other relevant laws. 115 Writing Crisis Management MessagesCopy this template. Good Morning: Opening: Buffer: State your reason for writing. As you know, this past Monday, July 12, the FDA came to our plant for a spot inspection. I’m writing to share the inspection results and our response. Middle: State the bad news factually and calmly. The good news is that the FDA inspectors did not find problems warranting a shutdown of Premium Meats. However, the bad news is that the inspectors cited us for three major violations resulting in a fine of $100,000. Focus on solutions: what has been done and what needs to be done. The FDA is sending us a clear message. We must take immediate steps to protect our customers, our jobs, and our company. To that end, I have taken the following steps:
Closing: Stress a positive future, but be realistic. Ask for feedback, if appropriate. With short-term solutions and long-term cooperation, we will keep Premium Meats operating and prospering. If you have any suggestions or questions, please speak to your immediate supervisor or a member of the Quality Task Force. Lawrence Durante 116 Writing Negative Change AnnouncementsCopy this template. January 15, 2019 Policy 46759 Ms. Virginia Beloit 72 Elias Street Washington, DC 20018-8262 Dear Ms. Beloit: Opening: Buffer: Introduce the topic and its context. Periodically, insurance companies review their policies, assess the cost of offering the policies, and make changes where needed. When that happens, it’s my responsibility as an insurance agent to inform my clients and help them make necessary adjustments. Middle: Give rationale for the change. Last week Hawkeye Casualty, the company with whom you have your auto insurance policy, discontinued all policies for drivers considered “high risk.” Because you have had a traffic accident within the past 12 months and have received two speeding tickets during the same period, the company has relabeled your status as “high risk.” State the change. If possible, offer help. As a result, Hawkeye Casualty has cancelled your auto-insurance policy effective January 31, 2019. However, I have found another company that will offer you auto insurance. While the cost of this new policy is somewhat higher than your present policy, the coverage is comparable, and the company is reliable. Closing: Explain what the reader should do. Please call me at 612-489-0020 within the next week so we can discuss the situation and decide how to proceed. Sincerely, Eric Wright EW/RN 117 Writing Poor Results ExplanationsCopy this template. Good morning, Laurie, Julie, and Mark: Opening: Buffer: Explain the context and give some good news. Last week, Jesse Cam from marketing sent me last year's sales report, along with a summary of our customer survey (copies attached). As the report shows, we had another good year: annual receipts in our three stores increased 9 percent. In addition, the survey shows that customers’ satisfaction with our Maintenance Departments continues to be high: 74 percent, Excellent; 18 percent, Good; 6 percent, Fair; and 2 percent, Poor. That’s great news—and our employees deserve the credit! Middle: Explain the problem, focusing on issues and solutions, not individuals. However, the survey also shows that our sales personnel can improve. During your next meetings with them, please read through customers’ comments listed in Jesse’s summary. Note statements like those listed below, identify the problems, and discuss how we can improve:
Closing: Politely explain follow-up. After reviewing the attachments and then meeting with your sales staffs, please write a report on your findings and send copies to Jim N., Jamie, and me. Thanks, Bernice Gardener 118 Writing Proposal RejectionsCopy this template. March 25, 2019 Mr. Gavin Farnsworth Miami Computer Enterprises Box 115 South Benton Mall Miami, FL 33166-1217 Dear Gavin: Opening: Buffer: Show appreciation. Thank you for your proposal that I join your Customer Training Department. I appreciate your confidence in my ability to provide Miami Computer Enterprises’ clients with instruction and technical support. Middle: Give your reasons objectively, stress positives in the proposal, state the rejection tactfully, and explore other options. While considering your proposal, I reflected on the reasons that I started my own computer-consulting service two years ago. One of the reasons was flexibility. As an independent consultant, I could regulate my work activities around family demands. Although your proposal was financially attractive, I must turn down your offer, at least for now. In 17 months (August 2020), my youngest child will enter grade school. If you are still interested in me at that time, I would be happy to reconsider your proposal. Until then, I hope you will want me to continue doing contract projects for MCE, especially with your Spanish-speaking clients. Closing: End positively. Thanks again for your generous proposal. I wish MCE continued growth and success. Yours sincerely, Juanita Guiverra 119 Writing Donation-Request DenialsCopy this template. April 16, 2019 Ms. Marlis DeQuincey Executive Director Family First Center 468 Provis Way Fairfield, NY 12377-2089 Opening: Buffer: Express interest in the reader’s cause.Dear Ms. DeQuincey: I read with interest your letter about Family First Center’s project. Your efforts to build a shelter for women and children victimized by domestic violence is certainly commendable. Middle: Provide clear reasons for not participating. I am honored that you have invited Rankin Technologies to participate in your project. Rankin seeks to be a good corporate citizen and a positive force in the community. To that end, we have already committed ourselves to partnerships with nonprofit organizations that mesh with Rankin’s interests in the environment, in urban renewal, and in Third-World development. State the refusal tactfully. For this reason, we cannot participate in your project at this time. If possible, offer an alternative. Rankin employees will, however, be encouraged to continue to support your work in the community campaign. In fact, I will distribute materials about your project to our employees so that individuals may choose to get involved. Closing: Affirm the reader. I wish you well, Ms. DeQuincey, in your important work of helping the victims of physical and emotional violence in this community. Yours sincerely, Barbara Reinholdt Office Manager br/dn 120 Writing Funding-Request DenialsCopy this template. Opening: Buffer: Restate the request and offer a point of agreement. Dear Oscar: I’ve reviewed your request to send all the sales reps to the Netware training seminar in Cincinnati. Oscar, I agree that this training would help your staff be more productive. Middle: State your reasons briefly, clearly, and objectively. If possible, explore alternatives. With your request in mind, I reviewed our training budget to see if we could afford the seminar. A large portion of our budget has already been used to upgrade design software for the engineering staff. In addition, we have some prior commitments for training office staff in August. Therefore, there is not enough money available to send all sales reps to Cincinnati. Perhaps there’s another way. If we sent two of your key staff to the seminar, they could then train others in your department. Or we could plan an extensive in-house training session for your entire group. Closing: End on a note of encouragement. I’d be happy to explore these or other options with you. With a little creativity, I think that we could get your reps the training they need. Just call or email me (ext. 3957). Sincerely, Jim Avoid the following words and phrases when rejecting a request:
121 Writing Suggestion RejectionsCopy this template. Opening: Buffer: Restate the suggestion and show appreciation. Hi, Duane: Thanks for suggesting that Rankin create work-at-home possibilities for staff. I’ve been intrigued with this work concept for some time. Middle: Explain how you reviewed the suggestion and why it won’t work. Explore other options. I asked Melissa St. James in Human Resources about the costs and benefits of telecommuting. She said that her department conducted a feasibility study on telecommuting three years ago and concluded that it would not benefit the company for these reasons:
Perhaps the situation has changed since that study. Melissa said that she would be willing to discuss the idea with you. Closing: Affirm the reader and invite further suggestions. Please follow up on that offer, Duane. In addition, please continue to submit suggestions for improving operations here at Rankin. I appreciate your work! Best wishes, Art 122 Checklist Writing Bad NewsYour goal when sending bad news is to write a message that is clear, fair, and courteous. My writing . . .
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